When Harper Absconds to Peru

When Harper absconds to Peru
You know Stephen’s got himself in a stew
Quack, quack he clucks
Then on a jet he ducks
But upon his return there’ll be barbecue.

The Bluenose Will Go Down On Harper’s Watch

Lokshtanov

by Jack Locke

The Bluenose will go down on Harper’s watch
Our ship will sink on a submerged sand bar
Captain has his crew tightly by the crotch.

He said he sought to raise the jib a notch
But the mainsail adjoining came ajar
The Bluenose will go down on Harper’s watch.

A tyrannical skipper will debauch
To Hell with Halifax harbour, har, har
Captain has his crew tightly by the crotch.

Anticipating doom I reach for a Scotch
But put it flat down in order to spar
The Bluenose will go down on Harper’s watch.

Westerlies have brought a squalling Sasquatch
Who has escaped from northern sandy tar
Captain has his crew tightly by the crotch.

His mastering of bait is topnotch
Self-aggrandizement is what his plans are
The Bluenose will go down on Harper’s watch
Captain has his crew tightly by the crotch.

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Word Sonnet For Richard Henry Bain Who Is On Trial For Trying

by Jack Locke

The
shot
heard
round
the
province
never
ended
Quebec’s
bitter
battle
nor
started
it.